Today is my third time going to the AACF meeting, and in case you're wondering, AACF stands for Asian American Christian Fellowship. Despite being a muslim, why on earth would i go to a Christian meeting? Don't ask, I don't know. I just want to learn.
The reason why i went there in the first place, is that Paul ask me whether or not i was free that day. Giving it some thought, "It can't be that bad, can it? It's just a learning process. After all, I'm still Muslim and Islam is my faith, let's keep it that way. So we made it there with a couple of friends, and here is the story, in short.
First time being there: I listened to a sermon by a black guy. He's pretty cool. We had fun time listening to him about how he relates the idea of us (humans) as salad dressings. We're as humans, like a mixture of oil and vinegar, trying to coexist, but we really are not able to, can we? Anyways, you engineers get the idea. Haha.
2nd time: I brought 2 Malaysians with me to have a small meeting. They helped me last week for an interfaith program, setting up the meeting and such, and we're finally made it there like a bunch of assholes being late. Urgh, I felt so bad for making them waiting. Anyways, we had a group meeting (about 3-4 in a group) and we share different things, beliefs, backgrounds, and our upbringing. Stuffs like that. I listened to this person, when she shares her malaysian value of being here, and stuffs like that. It's funny when she asked them "Do you know how many malaysians are here? " and when she told them the number, James, Judy, and Eugene seemed so surprised . Haha, because they haven't look at the MSAV website perhaps? Overall, it was very interesting but we couldn't be there for long since she had to pick some people up later for a talk in ICN. She asked me if i want to come over too, and i was like "errr" and there was an ackward pause before i said ok. Not that i don't want to, but since i've already made commitment to Paul, and i felt bad of leaving them just like that. I mean, it's OK, probably Paul would understand, I haven't gone to ICN for quite a while anyways. It's time to make tiny difference in life after all.
3rd time: Today, to be exact. I tried to get them to come, but probably with the finals and such, I can't. After all, they're going to the ICN later. Or probably they have senior designs or studying for the finals. It's ok, i'm still going anyways. I had a test last night that I had to study for, so, I kinda wanna chill for the night. Today, I made friends with the merceneries. Not that kind of merceneries, but the ones who go out and make people convert into Christianity. So they say. All 8 of them. There were some prayers related activity, but i just kept quiet and pray to Allah instead. Sometimes, going to this kinda of meeting, when you're not supposed to be in it is rather stupid, so what they said, but to me, personally, I wanted to learn Christianity, so that I could outreach these people, and tell them our side of the story too. "Syaf, our job is just to convey the message, not to convert" someone said that to me last time and that is why I will remember this. I just wanna look and learn about this fellowship, and make benefits out of it. To me, Christians and Islam are the most respected faiths in the world. WHY? I DONT KNOW. Don't ask why. But i know that they have something in common. Probably not the right way to oversee it, but it's like having 2 persons sitting in a tree, on different branches. And I start thinking, why is it so hard for them to outreach one another? Because we're paranoid of having to convert? I think that's bullshit. Why? Because if something is the best faith, why afraid to listen to other faith that is no match to our faith? We're humans with intellects, we know how to make comparison, to think and to choose. I believe, whatever faith you're in, it never hurt to listen to the story of others. Just that we chose not to doesn't mean it's not there. Because our parents do not nurture us this way? So what? Things have change, it's the 21 century now, its time to move on. If you believe that your faith is the best faith of the truth, go on, you could listen to the views of others and not having a single problem of listening to others complaints. Don't be afraid. At least that' what i think, despite the fact that I'm such a bad muslim. But i know that I'm learning for the better.
To these 2 people who really helped me a lot. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. I'm just a struggler, who wants to know the truth, though not a single glance of me portraying it. I belive, I'm not a good muslim. So what? At least I'm making progress, though it ain't that much. I'm still learning in my own way. And in my heart, I think I'm doing the right thing, despite what's the outcome in store.... It's ok, I don't even bother to know what's the outcome is going to be like but I'll leave it to fate, I've dare enough to make a small difference in my life, though it's nothing much. I don't know for how much time would I be able to live in this petty world, but I think the best possible way to place this is to consider it as my sweet surrender. I felt losing, but there's as well sweetness in it.
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